Thursday, July 26, 2007

WrestleMania @ Your Library

We're living in the end times, ladies and gentleman. The barbarians are inside the gates and they're tearing down the fortress of culture, literacy, education, and intelligence so many worked for so long to build.

But there are many consolations to living in the end times. Cheap consumer electronics. Abundant martinis. And of course -- WrestleMania!!

And what could be better than WrestleMania?

WrestleMania @ Your Library!!

Brought to you by ALA, the YALSA/WrestleMania Reading Challenge. Yay!! (The ALA, as always, is a godsend for the AL.)

So contact your local lowbrow entertainment center, er, I mean public library, and sign up for the WrestleMania Reading Challenge today!

Coming next month: the NASCAR Reading Challenge, which will be a great boon to the libraries as their demographic has rarely included illiterate rednecks.

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

WWE blew over about 5 years ago at my library. The teens don't care about WWE - they are on MySpace and Sconix. I will be interested to see how this works.

Brent said...

Since public libraries caters to wrestling fans, the poor, the public wankers, and MySpacers, I'll continue to go to the book store.

I understand that by hating that many people, I hate America, but that's not true. Jefferson is my BFF.

Anonymous said...

One of my colleagues suggests that we shouldn't expect consistency because you are a women.

Is this why you dismissed public libraries as having no role or value in assisting with the research needs of their public in a previous post and then you criticise Teen reading initiatives which are completely appropriate to the low brow establishments you think you have identified?

Could be of course that you are wrong and that librarians "out in the sticks" are trying to ignore the sound of duelling banjoes in order to attempt to supply a comprehensive service to the child and to the emeritus Professors retired to the desert for their health and to the rest of their community.

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

Of course, I am waiting for the Lindsay Lohan/Brittany Spears "Let's hear it for Nietsche" Fest. Yeah! That would be great. Can you imagine a reading of Thus spake Zarathustra?
With boobs yet!
As for anonymous who said one shouldn't expect consistency because you are a women (sic!): you need a life.

Anonymous said...

Yalsa! Yalsa! Yalsa! Sounds like an Italian sports hero. Expecting teenagers to want to participate in the National Reading Challenge Title for a the coveted ringside seat at Wrestlemania is one of the sillier things I've heard of. I can see the proud parents now--"My boy READ his way to Wrestlemania!"

I liked it better when the ALA was using material that was more subtle and subliminal, like all those posters of semi-famous people staring glumly at you with "READ" printed on the bottom. The awestruck viewer never failed in their response, "read what?"

Greta the Librarian said...

David. dear library tech. I do think that the anon comment was apt and as a woman require no defense even by the use of cliches, "get a life" (sic)thanks.

AL was being inconsistent and unable to recognise that librarians who deal with children and teens tend to inhabit a world of their own nas well disparaging public libraries in general.

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

Greta and the afore mentioned Anon:
Please remember, and take into account, the curmuge-ish humor which AL writes her articles. This is a site for banter of the "annoyed" variety, and should be read as such, as AL has pointed out many times. If you don't like it, don't read it.

Anonymous said...

Brent, America's what you make it not what it makes you. No one HAS to be a plebian, illiterate, MySpace junkie, wrestling fan, public library user, but if you choose to be such, then there's a place for you here, just as there is a place for the research-savvy, well-read, highly engaged, TV-hating, organic food eating, public library user. America is great for this reason alone.

But, the choice (or choices) are all up to you and that kind of freedom scares the hell out of most people. I prefer to live with Wrestlemania Wackos than with authoritarian-dulled theocratic drones who despise freedom of choice.

soren faust

AL said...

Everyone's so serious today!

Anonymous said...

Dave lib tech,

AL has on numerous occasions bemoaned the fact that people or groups, such as the SRRT, have no ability to debate issues dispassionately or listen to anyone but their own butt-kissing cronies. Is that what we want from this blog? Butt-kissing cronies of AL? Yes, AL. No, AL.

If someone reads something written by AL and has a legitimate disagreement than I believe the AL would welcome that (of course, I'm speaking for AL here, sorry if out of turn).

I hope this site is not a "agree with everything AL says club" If so, how boring.

soren faust

Anonymous said...

See AL, you veer off course from Irish bottoms and foot fetishists, and you get drollery. Add a dash of collectivism and we've done got Regressive.

--Taupey

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

Anonymous re: yes sir no sir.
Actually, that was part of my point, though I didn't express it. Disagreeing with AL is all right by me, especially over the merits of martinis (wine for me ;);)o:
The core of my point is, I enjoy the rants, they are funny. And librarians who don't appreciate funny are pretty sad. You know the type: they go to ALA conventions on their holidays and pay for it themselves, dream about the latest edition of Anglo-American cataloguing rules,etc. Librarians should have other interests, such as foot fetishes and martinis.
The yes sir no sir approach is rather Library-Nazi, I must agree.

Brent said...

America is great!

I'll use latex gloves the next time I go to my public library. Geez...

Anonymous said...

Rasslin' has been supplanted by mixed martial arts as the entertainment of choice for the unwashed slack-jawed yokels, anyway. This is another example of libraries hilariously trying to hop on buried bandwagons. Maybe the YALSA can get the Knack or Mayim Bialik for next year's Reading Challenge.

Anonymous said...

Look, all I really want is to work in a profession where my interests and competencies intersect in one spectacular explosion of stunning professional ecstasy and personal aggrandizement bordering on total and immutable apotheosis of self. Where opportunities for both personal and professional bliss are eternal, night is banished, and my energy is uncontainable.

soren faust

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

Dear Soren/Anonymous:
Now THAT's funny!
Thanks :)

AL said...

Soren, that's all I want! Is that so wrong?

And anyone who always agrees with what I say on this blog is probably demented in some way. I don't even agree with everything I say on the AL. And as a lot of readers know, I'm happy to have criticism, and will occasionally even respond as time permits, though I think the time we all went from intellectual freedom to debating the finer points of the French Revolution was a little bizarre. Also, unless I'm just creeped out by a comment, or I think it's overly rude to one of the other commenters, I don't delete them, and I'm happy to let dissenters have a voice on the blog. (The first comment I've deleted in months was last week when one commenter said another commenter was just an idiot or something like that. Personal slurs with no criticism steps over even my boundaries.)

One of the things I like best about this blog is the discussion and arguments that sometimes occur in the comments section. I don't see the same thing on many other library blogs, and, to be honest, it's one of the things that keeps me writing.

Having said that, criticisms of me because I'm not earnest or considerate or consistent enough are welcome, but wasted. It's a satiric blog, after all.

Walt Lessun said...

Totally agree about wrestlemania. But, what's wrong with NASCAR
~Dick Trickle Fan

Anonymous said...

Of all the librarian blogs I visit from time to time, I consistently come back to this one. It is always provocative, never too seriously a tone is taken, and the author advertises only the more simple and fundamental pleasures in life, i.e. martinis.

soren faust

Anonymous said...

soren,

you're so bloody witty. you've won my heart with your prolix moxie.

xo,
budding (flower of a) librarian

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

AL:
But Shirley...I mean surely you must like SOMETHING as much as martinis. I honestly don't get a drink that tries to obscure the wonderful round taste of olives. They are such a bountiful food, especially on a Greek salad with lots of feta.

AL said...

I'm not sure I do love anything as much as a good martini. I love Cary Grant and Miles Davis, for example, but not as much as a martini made with good gin and Noilly Prat in a 4-or-5:1 ratio, shaken hard, and served straight up and bitterly cold in a chilled cocktail glass with a single, tiny pitted olive resting on the bottom. My goodness, I think I hear one calling me name right now. I think I'll head home and have one while listening to Relaxin' with the Miles Davis Quintet. If only Cary Grant would come over and flirt with me, my day would be complete. I might have to follow up with His Girl Friday or The Awful Truth or the Philadelphia Story.

Kane said...

Now if we can somehow use pro-wrestling finishing moves on some technophiliac bloggeurs who are listed on AL's blogroll, count me in. Yes, I occasionally watch professional wrestling. I'll spare you my defense of pro-wrestling, but suffice it to say, it does require a great deal of athleticism and mental discipline. Bubba hitting his cousin with a 2x4 in the backyard doesn't cut it anymore in pro-wrestling. Still, I think this YALSA program is stupid.

Brent said...

I like Miles Davis, but Cary Grant? Have you seen North By Northwest?

Bunny Watson said...

AL, I vote for Indiscreet or Bringing Up Baby (As I recall there's much martini drinking in the former).

AL said...

I LOVE North by Northwest. Martini in the Oak Bar at the Plaza? Flirting with Eva Marie Saint on the Century? Classic stuff. How could anyone not like Cary Grant? Insanity, I suppose.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I like the Knack!

Brent said...

OK, did you remember the scene where they are climbing the Mount Rushmore, seriously? Comeon.

But he was right to flirt with Eva Marie Saint. Even Marlon Brando got her in On The Waterfront. And she wanted to be a nun in that film.

Anonymous said...

A couple of the people posting have made me wonder if they weren't sending their text through one of those automated language translators, although the question is what language they were using originally.

As for the whole Cary Grant thing, well, I'm a guy so I wouldn't have minded being Cary Grant, but then Cary Grant also wished he could have been Cary Grant. Look it up, it's an actual quote. Or Sean Connery, but no Roger Moore, he was too Vidal Sassoon.

Now for whom I would like to flirt with, Ann Margaret or Jacqueline Bisset comes to mind. Music wise I'm still stuck in my Vivaldi/Led Zeppelin bipolar mishmash.

David, Library Tech. up. North said...

North by Northwest is the last elegant thriller. Love the early scenes with the guy who would play Chief in Get Smart. And the train entering the tunnel at the end. Get it? Huh, get it? You see, it's a tunnel, and the train enters it because...well, never mind.
AL, I think you would enjoy a jazz singer/pianist by the name of Blossom Dearie. That's her real name. She is DEFINITELY martooni music. Her stuff has been re-issued on VERVE. Speaking of Vivaldi/Led Zepplin : Jimi Hendrix owned and lived in the flat that was once occupied by Handel while he was composing the Messiah. Hendrix really got off on that and became quite the Baroque devotee.

contrarian said...

From wrestling to martini lore. This is a great blog. Oh, and all the great commentary about the library world.

Anonymous said...

Here’s an idea that may address many of the problems ALA is facing. Let the candidates for ALA Presidency wrestle for the office. Incumbent gets to choose the medium (e.g., mud).

Advantages:
Since no one seems to be able to indulge in polite debate using logic and reason, it might fit the spirit of the times better.
Since people feel so passionately about their worldview, it might result in some high quality fights. It might attract the attention of the WWE, and some Librarians might find a more fulfilling career as a professional wrestler, or doing underwear commercials on TV, thus creating some vacancies in the Library field for new grads.
Think of what the President’s Message in American Libraries would look like just prior to the “election:” no more of the all too familiar catchphrases we see now. Instead, we might see this: “I’m going to crush your face into the [insert medium] … I am the greatest …
Each candidate could recruit a cheering section from local public library patrons. They would have to log a predetermined amount of reading to qualify. Travel and lodging to cheer the fight would be paid by ALA.
It might attract more Librarians to come to the meetings, at least the one where the candidates fight it out.
IT might make people take notice when ALA made a pronouncement on non-library issues. Society seems to hold the opinions of athletes in high regard, no matter what they say.
What do you think?

My favorite Cary Grant movie is Father Goose. If memory serves, I saw an interview with CG many years ago in which he was asked what role from his movies was most like his authentic persona. He said that it was Father Goose.

Anonymous said...

No, let The Library Workers of the World decide. I'd vote for Jello.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to suggest a mixed martial arts competition to find the next dean at my library. It would be more dignified than the affirmative action festival my last employer engaged in to find suitable workers.

WDL said...

Cary Grant is fantastic, and I'll have to second Bringing up Baby. That was the Cary Grant I wanted to sleep with.

OK, I always wanted to sleep with him.

Martini: Bombay Sapphire Gin with extra lemon. It must be COLD!!

And as for YALSA - well, thats what you get for catering to children. Instead of gearing them up, they dumb them down.

*shudder*

xo,
WDL

Anonymous said...

WDL---

"dumbing down" has been the m.o. of public libraries for quite a while now. Still waiting for American Idol karaoke to hit.

As for Cary Grant, I still like "Suspicion"---still can't look at a glass of milk the same way again after that.

Anonymous said...

Rednecks don't use libraries nor do they pay attention to anything but Michele Malkin and Rush Limbaugh so it is wrong to even consider them.
They don't drink martinis,either, just rye. Teens should not be catered to.
I like AL because this is the place where the smart people smite the smarmy.

theotherwaldo said...

We in the library have no sense of humor that we are aware of.

Kevin Musgrove said...

If it were down to me, all public libraries would be supplied with Jacqueline Bissett in a wet T-shirt and all us systems guys would have hot and cold running Jane Birkin.

Cary Grant may be available to (female) lending staff as part of a drive to incentivise circulation throughput.

Reference Library staff would be supplied with enough Clifton Webb as to provide a more than usually customer-centric service.

WDL said...

hey now. some guys would like to borrow cary grant as well.

sounds like an ALA and GLAAD would be knocking on your library door otherwise.

and that, dear, would be annoying.

xo,
WDL