Monday, July 17, 2006

Annoyed Librarian Library Blog Taxonomy

Walt Crawford is preparing his new study of library blogs, and that got me to thinking about the wonderful world of bibliotekblogging. Inspired by his example, I thought I would come out with my own taxonomy of library blogs. I'm sure his study will be thorough and insightful, because he likes to work hard and do useful things for the profession. I, of course, don't. So what follows is my exhaustive analysis and classification of library blogs, arrived at by carefully scrutinizing Walt Crawford's Bloglines subscriptions for about 10 minutes.

Library Blog as Personal Diary
"Before I went to the library today, I brushed my teeth. And believe me, I needed to."

Library Blog as Personal Diary Written by Andy Rooney
"Before I went to the library today, I brushed my teeth. Did you ever notice there always seems to be at least one more little squeeze left in a tube of toothpaste? I've been using the same tube of toothpaste since 1973."

Library Blog as Professional Therapy
"I'm going to tell you about this bloody awful library patron, because if I don't tell someone, I might be forced to garotte him with his own entrails. As this is extremely messy and might stain my new sweater, I felt it better to release my frustration through this blog."

Library Blog as Personal Cry for Help
"I hate my job, my boss, my life, and my thighs. Can't someone just shoot me now?"

Library Blog as Pathetic Cry for Attention
"I'm not busy right now, so I thought I'd write in my blog. I like writing in my blog. I hope you like reading my blog. Blogging is fun! Let me tell you about my day."

Library Blog as Counter-Librarian Blog
"You think you know all about librarians! Well, you don't know all about me! I'm the Cool Librarian! I catalog metadata wearing stylish sunglasses! I dress in chic thrift store clothes and I look amazingly sexy in black undergarments!"

Library Blog as Professional Self-promotion
"Let me tell you about how great I am, and all the wonderful things I've been doing. I'm a deadly serious and highly dedicated librarian who's doing all sorts of clever and cutting edge things. Please keep this in mind when I apply for a job @ your library."

Library Blog as Serious Library Report
"Many things have been happening in our library. People checked out videos. There was storytime. Here's a picture of me in front of our new Celebrity read poster."

Library Blog as Witty Library Report
"A funny thing happened in the library today."

Library Blog as Book Review Medium
"This is a great book! I love it! It's got a really neat plot and lots of vampires! Read it and recommend it to your patrons!"

Library Blog as Book Free Zone
"Nobody reads books anymore! They read blogs! They're into synchronous, asymetrical, diaphonic synergizing, and they want to do it in your library! Get rid of those old dusty books, and make way for more videogames!"

Library Blog as Librarian Cheerleader
"Librarians are great! We're the greatest people in the world! And we need to get out and show people how great we are!"

Library Blog as Cynical Library Critic
"Library school is stupid, library work is boring, and librarians have bad hair and huge bottoms."

Library Blog as Informative Library Analysis
"Libraries are promoting themselves in a range of ways these days, from the trite to the clever."

Library Blog as Unpaid Technology Advertising
"The Little Tech Widget is just the tool you need to promote your library! I'm really excited about the Little Tech Widget! I use a lot of exclamation points to show how excited I am! Whenever I use the Little Tech Widget, I get so excited I lose all bladder control! You can, too!"

Library Blog as Informative Technology Selection Tool
"The Little Tech Widget certainly has much to recommend it, but there are some flaws to consider. For example, the unexplained loss of bladder control."

Library Blog as Future Manifesto
"Everything libraries have ever done is wrong, because I don't understand what they've been doing. I'm here to show you how to do it right! I have the library of the future in my head, and I'm going to share it with you!"

Library Blog as Business Manifesto
"Libraries need to act more like businesses, because they're both very similar! They both sell stuff! Sort of! Libraries need to jump onto whatever bandwagon is currently raging through the business world!"

Library Blog as Left-wing Propaganda
"The ALA represents the downtrodden of the world, and so do I! I'm very earnest and concerned and think the ALA should solve every problem in the world! And I hate President Bush!"

Library Blog as Right-wing Propaganda
"The Left-wing Propagandist needs to shut the flock up! And I love President Bush!"

Library Blog as Fair and Balanced Political Analysis
"The SRRT should stop using the ALA as a tool to promote its irrelevant political agenda. And I haven't said anything about President Bush!"

Library Blog as Inoffensive Satire
"Clown Suits, On Wearing During Storytime: When wearing a clown suit during storytime, be sure to zip your fly. Nothing says 'Sick Clown' like an open zipper."

Library Blog as Offensive Satire
"Check out this latest library job that sucks!"


waltc said...

Now I really won't attempt any taxonomy, or even folksonomy, of the liblogs I'm looking at!

Actually, I'm as lazy as they come. I just like to see the results of the this case, curiosity outweighs laziness. It's not hard work; it's satisfying my curiosity.

Taupey, the Bush Kangaroo said...

Hmmm, what would your critic think:

He is most definitely not amused by peeing in buckets. Heaven forefend his reaction to "Laptop Librarians au Go-Go 2006: A Russ Meyer Revivial"

Taupey, the Bush Kangaroo said...

PS: Read down where he criticizes *you* m'dear.

Also, The Hot Librarian is really first rate and not so much a librbarian blog as an example of what maureen down could write if hse had talent, a life and human emotions--where does that fit in the taxonomy

Taupey, the Bush Kangaroo said...


Your presence is unnerving!

Annoyed Librarian said...

Just calm down. Everything will be okay.

Annoyed Librarian said...

By the way, despite my careful scrutiny of Walt Crawford's Bloglines subscriptions, I wasn't aware there actually is a blog called the "Cool Librarian." Any similarity between that blog and the "Cool Librarian" I mocked in the "Library Blog as Counter-Libarian" blog is unintentional.

Taupey, the Bush Kangaroo said...

I took a peek at the Cool Librarian and all I think is: God, if The Onion's Jean Teasdale had never married hubby Rick and gone for an MLS instead...

Annoyed Librarian said...

I have not actually read the "Cool Librarian." However, Jean Teasdale is my writing role model. Her apparent disappearance from the Onion roster has been a great loss to us all.

Taupey, the Bush Kangaroo said...

We should all have a martini or a Jeanketeer-tini in her honor!

Dances with Books said...

Wow, that is just brilliant, and the degree of accuracy, just spooky.

Jessica said...

Ha! I just now stumbled upon this post, and the subsequent comments, while doing a vanity search on one of the new LIS search engines that are popping up via the Google Co-Op thingie.

I am beyond flattered to be mentioned in the same sentence as Jean Teasdale!

Of late my blog has been a bit angsty.... I do hope you'll visit!

The "Cool Librarian"

Isaac Huffman said...

I think there is a difference between a library blog and a librarian bog. But you got what is going on. How about, the "I'm pissed at my place of employment" Blog.

Isaac Huffman