Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Even More Finding the AL

Because I'm way too busy to be annoyed, I have to post on something that doesn't require me to think. So I scrolled through the last 1000 hits on the Annoyed Librarian and picked out some of the search terms that led people to the AL. This leaves out "annoyed librarian" and some variation on "cambridge who's who scam," which still lead the pack. The great thing is, this stuff writes itself.

irish porno
Four different times! Who knew sex with leprechauns was so popular?

librarians never retire they just
Die of boredom? Are weeded from the collection? Get shelved in a new location? Anyway, the phrase is "old librarians never die, they just...." Moron.

why leave current job interview
You should leave your current job interview if the interviewer starts asking you what kind of car you would like to be. Or if they start swearing at you and calling you names. Or if the interviewers give off a collective funky smell.

"once more into the breach" phrase origin
Yep, I started that one. Pretty catchy, I think.

Why do some Librarians make less money than a garbage collector
Because garbage collectors are more important to society. Which would be worse, going a month without using the library, or going a month without having your garbage collected? I rest my case.

reasons to date a librarian
You can get your overdue fines waived? You can get into all the trendiest nightclubs? I don't know, because I don't date librarians.

What's the difference between a M.L.S and a M.A. in library science
Everything! The difference is crucially important, and if you have to ask about this then you're so clueless you'll never get a job!

"i come not in peace but with a sword"
Said the Annoyed Librarian.

topless librarian
God help us.

american librarian ass
You've come to the right place. Or perhaps not. Are you calling someone that, or trying to get some of it? Never mind, I really don't want to know.

A separate document that provides information which demonstrates your understanding of, sensitivity to, and respect for the diverse academic, socio-economic, ethnic, religious, and cultural backgrounds, disability, and sexual orientation of community colle
Don't bother with keywords or a short phrase, just throw the whole thing in there! Sounds like someone else was trying to figure out what the hell that means.

monmouth, illinois a great place for a wal-mart
I've never been there, but if it's a poor, dumpy town in the middle of nowhere, you're probably right.

getting rid of old porn books
I suggest Ebay. Don't donate them to the public library. They moved all their porn to computers a while back. Though maybe they'd fetch something at the book sale.

wanted, white hot old men
I can't figure out if the desiderata are old white men who are hot, or old men who are "white hot." No, maybe the person was looking for wanted (as in by the FBI) old white men who are hot, or old men who are white hot and also wanted. Or something. Revise the search!

in the mood but not wet
Just wait until you see the leprechauns, baby!

11 comments:

Dances With Books said...

Oh, my goodness, thanks for the laugh. Even when you are not thinking, I get something good from this blog.

Sex with leprechauns? Meh. Sex with leprechauns and librarians. Hmm.

On a serious note, I actually did have a job interview where I got yelled at and insulted. I thought the guy, who would have been my boss, either snapped or just was plain crazy. His coworkers just sat there too. Needless to say, I moved on.

AL said...

Someone who interviewed for a CIA librarian position claimed that part of the interview consisted of them yelling at him and calling him names, I suppose to toughen him up in case he ever got captured from the CIA library in Virginia. He should have responded, "I'm not a field man. I'm just a librarian."

janitorx said...

You should leave your current job interview if the interviewer starts asking you what kind of car you would like to be.

I was asked this question when I was a wee little college freshman going through sorority rush. I can't even remember how I answered that question, but I was thankfully dropped by this sorority during the next round.

And yes, I was in a sorority. I know that's cheezy as hell.

laura k said...

>>What's the difference between a M.L.S and a M.A. in library science
Everything! The difference is crucially important, and if you have to ask about this then you're so clueless you'll never get a job!<<

Wow. Well, as someone who is only just starting to research this stuff in preparation for getting an M.L.S., and had never even heard of an M.A. in Library Science, it's good to know that I'm so clueless I might as well just forget it. Thanks!

AL said...

Because I don't want people ruining their career and lives over this, I'll let you know there is no difference. It's just what different schools call it.

janitorx said...

I have an MS in Library Studies from an ALA accredited program.

Wow! I can say I have an MS. *sarcasm*

Anonymous said...

I can see how your "Ass" (post)gets certain hits, but what's up with the Celtic roll in the shamrocks related searches?

--Taupey

AL said...

I really have no idea, but at least four times 'irish porno' has found me, according to the site meter. I haven't checked out the search because I'm afraid of what I'd find.

Zillah said...

Laughed so hard I tipped over my martini.

Those not familiar with the AL take her biting commentary too seriously.

I didn't actually know that there were schools offering an M.A. in LIS. ALA accreditation is what counts for getting a job.

Question:

Is it more entertaining to say MissLiss (MSLIS) or Malice (MALIS)?

AL said...

I much prefer malice. I also was not aware of such an MA. I've seen MLS, MLIS, and MSLIS. But Obviously I haven't seen it all. Probably not ALA-accredited anyway. We know how hard it must be to get that ALA-accreditation.

Anonymous said...

Iowa has an MA in Library and Information Science