Library Jobs That Suck #1

Being a librarian is one of the most bizarre career choices anyone could ever make. Where else are you required to have not only a college degree but a master's degree (well, sort of a master's degree, anyway) to take jobs that sometimes pay less than $30K/year? What kind of "profession" is that? And why isn't the ALA doing something about it instead of passing idiotic resolutions?

To draw attention to the problem of bad library jobs, the Annoyed Librarian will, in the spirit of public service, occasionally discuss currently available jobs. That's right. Actual Job Postings. This stuff isn't made up, because if it was, no one would believe it.

This is one of the most bizarre job ads I've ever seen. Pacific Oaks College & Children's School (I am not pooping on you; this is really the name of the place) is looking for a temporary library director! The lucky winner gets to be a library director for 6-8 whole weeks! I sure hope they have an inside candidate, because I'm not sure where they'll find someone who 1) has the skills to be a library director and 2) is such a loser that they'd be willing to take a 6-8 week job as a library director.

Below are the qualifications, job functions, and most importantly, hours of operation. So if I were to apply for this job, and believe me it's tempting, I'd have to have an MLS, plus knowledge of technology trends and copyright issues. I could do that, I think. I'm pretty independent, too.

But then I'd have to have "Excellent cross-cultural communication and interpersonal skills." I'm not sure I have that, because I'm not sure what the heck it is. Does this mean I'd have to be able to speak enough Spanish to get the trash emptied, or would it do for me to be able to speak English really slowly and loudly?

And then there's "Sensitivity and commitment to issues of diversity and inclusion." I'm not sensitive to anything (well, except whatever's giving me this rash that's making me so cranky), so I think I'm out there. But I already work nights and weekends, so maybe I could feign the sensitivity. I could say, "OK, Mr. Diverse Person, I'm sensitive to whatever divisively diverse needs you inclusively include."

And I would really love any job where I got to direct library operations and teach BI classes! It would make me feel so important being able to order myself around like that.

For this I went to library school?

I think I'm going to apply.

QUALIFICATIONS:
Master's degree in Library Science
Knowledge of technology trends for libraries
Familiarity with copyright compliance issues
Experience with academic libraries
Demonstrated ability to provide outstanding student customer service
Excellent cross-cultural communication and interpersonal skills
Sensitivity and commitment to issues of diversity and inclusion
Ability to work independently and direct the work of others
Able to work evening and weekend hours
Expertise in Microsoft Office Suite, Internet

ESSENTIAL JOB FUNCTIONS:
Manage day to day operations of library and library staff
Coordinate the binding and storage of student theses
Supervise library staff
Provide bibliographic instruction to all students, local and remote
Direct cataloging and/or technical services support
Other duties as assigned

Library hours of operation:
Monday: Closed
Tuesday: 2pm – 8pm
Wednesday: 2pm – 8pm
Thursday: 2pm – 9pm
Friday: noon – 6pm
Saturday: 9am – 5pm
Sunday: noon – 5pm